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Reluctant prophet

If I told you I was I prophet
would you think I was vain
or just insane

If I told you that I know things
or that I'm able to see truths
that remain hidden from you
would you think that I was just vain
or simply insane

If I told you that God speaks to me
and answers my inquiries
would you think that I was simply vain
or totally insane

If I told you
that you should listen to me
because I have heard your prayers
and am prepared to share God's answers
would you think that I was totally vain
or completely insane

Of course, you've got no reason to believe me
for I'm just another prophet
in a long line of fools
that believed he could
make a difference

Maybe I am completely insane to believe
that anyone should listen
to what I've been asked to share
but then why would you
for you haven't been with me
through my long and endless pain

Maybe it's the pain
that has driven me to insanity
that has convinced me
that even though my faith wavered
God's faith in me never did

No you weren't with me
as I quietly suffered
down a long and lonely road
but God was there

You weren't there
to hear my desperate
cries of agony
nor were you there
to aid in my comfort
but God was there
he heard my screams
and quieted me with the truth

In the end
it doesn't really matter
whether you listen
to me or not

My mission is to share
what I've learned
in as simple and helpful
terms as possible
whether you learn anything
is up to you

Photo Courtesy of Flickr Creative Commons: cindy47452

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Hope in abundance

Last night I took a trip
I didn't mean to
It wasn't like I ingested something
with the sole intent
of experiencing the unknown

No, this was a journey to the abyss
Little bits of information
came at me from all angles
and I was pushed
to the edge of my sanity
And from where I stood
all around me was despair
all around me was futility

The next morning
is was difficult to awake
from my nightmare
We were smashed
between the vise-like grip
of cold lifeless hatred
and the seemingly immovable
wall of reality

Now as I sit here
I can remember my hopelessness
Everywhere I looked
there were warnings
but everyone around me
seemed hypnotized
by despair

This wasn't the first time
I've been to edge of this chasm
I'm repeatedly taken there
to witness the destruction
of humanity
It used to terrify me
and leave me grieving
in a pool of hopeless tears

But I've been there too many times
for it to scare me anymore
With gross familiarity
I can now witness
the end of our existence

I've become like a scientist
I can now experience our demise
with a sterile perspective
that allows me to see
but not feel

So I've been asked to
report back to humanity
and dispel the myths that
we use to prop up our
sense of reality

We are one
Just as certain
as I am here
sharing my tale
so are you
In fact
when I was at the end
so were you
Now when I'm challenged
I am not alone
For not only are you there with me
so is our Creator

He has asked me to tell you
to surrender your beliefs
She has instructed me to create
a new way of thinking,
a new way of relating
They want us to know that
it is time
time for us to look
beyond ourselves
and see the unity
that surrounds us
There is no separation
between our God and Ourself
God is within Us
We are God
Our will is God's will

Within Our heart lies
the greatest mystery
To love Ourself
is to love God
To love Ourself
is to love Everyone

Do you hear the truth?
Can you see truth
of our shared vision?
Know this
there is no end
there is no beginning
there simple is
Love the God within
each of Us
and there will
always be hope
in abundance

Photo Courtesy of Flickr Creative Commons: ecstaticist

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Home inspired drawings

It's been a while since I posted some of my work, so I scanned in a few drawings from my trip back home. These are once again, examples of Babblecards, or what you might call Shockobabble postcards.

This first one was inspired by a good ol'e fashion car show/parade. Went with my brother and it was a real gas. Plenty of beautiful cars, beer, and burn outs. How could anyone not find that inspiring?

These next two drawings were my original sketches for the two masks I did. The first one was done with the intent to create the ugliest and meanest face I could conjure up. What's cool about this sketch is it's one of my first original cartoon influenced characters. The second was my sketch for my biker demon. Again, these were both caricatures I drew from my imagination. In the past, I've copied elements of other photographs or drawings. So these show my growing confidence in cartooning.

I've still got to pull the picutres of the finished masks from my phone, but I've just been to lazy to hunt down the cable.

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Internet firehose vs Limited attention

If previous generations of artists warned against the evils of television, see Frank Zappa's anthem "I am the slime," what can we say about the Internet? For if slime only oozes out of our television sets, then the Internet is a like a firehose of ooze, blasting out at 800 psi.

While I'm amazed an titilated by what I find, I've begun to get more and more suspicious that it (the Internets) is a sweet temptation meant to lead me away from my dreams of becoming an acclaimed and recognized artist.

There was a time when I tried to stay on top of the thousands of new articles, RSS feeds, and email newsletters, etc. I actually felt as if I didn't peruse each one I might miss that one silver bullet that would magically change things. [I struggled to end that sentence because frankly I'm not sure what I was looking for, call it solve my problems, make me happy, give me the clue to achieve my dreams.] Of course, I now know there is no external silver bullet, magic, or solution.

Which leads us to the crux of the biscuit. One of the grandest contradictions I see in myself and the thousands people I've witnessed, is how I (they) can know what I (they) want to do or be, but still allow myself (themselves) to be tempted away with juicy images, articles, videos, behavior, and other ephemeralia. If I know there is no external silver bullet, why do I find it so difficult to focus on producing art?

It grinds upon my sensibilities when, for example, we claim to be Christian yet judge everyone around us, or not love ourselves (let alone our neighbors). It whittles away at my belief in the common good when people profess to be something when their actions are direct contradictions of their beliefs. What I'm trying to reaffirm to myself and anyone else who shares in this struggle, is that we must be eternally vigilant of our choices. We are what we do. We are what we think about. My focus must stay on producing art, because that's the only thing that will bring recognition and acclaim. Lord, give me the strength to step away from the firehose and be the artist I know that I am.

P.S. I'm stunned at how professionals can manage the infinite number of media choices thrown at them, yet still balance their choices and remain authentic. At this point I'm clueless how to manage this balance except by excluding everything (to the ultimate test and stretch of my attention and will) to focus on the pursuit of my art.
Photo Courtesy of Flickr Creative Commons: jurvetson